


The white book

by ChocoNut



Series: Many ways to say I love you [64]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Season 8 Fix It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2021-02-08 00:07:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21466792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChocoNut/pseuds/ChocoNut
Summary: When Brienne writes Jaime's deeds in the white book, she has an unexpected visitor.
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Series: Many ways to say I love you [64]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1234904
Comments: 31
Kudos: 150





	The white book

**Author's Note:**

> While I've been out of action for the last few days, I've been digging out the ones I had written long back. I had come up with this soon after 8x6 aired, but for some reason, never really posted it.  
So, here it is, and hope you like it.  
Special thanks to my bestie who helped me post this.

_ Escaped imprisonment and rode South in an attempt to save the capital from destruction. _

Brienne paused, glancing away from the page, blinking back the tears that invaded her eyes as she took a moment to contemplate how to conclude his tale. She searched her mind for words fitting enough to make sure the great lion’s legacy didn’t fade away, unremembered. Never would she know the true intent behind his retreat, but she chose, however, to retain the best of him her mind could hold. The last lovely night they’d spent together was the memory she wanted to seal their bond with, his body around her, warmer than the warmth the best furs could provide, his breath one with hers, his lips sealing hers with kisses that set her desires afire, and him buried in the depths of her like they were always meant to be together.

She sniffed, overpowered by emotions that refused to fall in line, hoping her heartbreak would, one day, subside, and along with it the unshed tears that refused to leave her be.

Then it came to her.

_ Died protecting his Queen, _she decided, putting quill to ink again to ensure the purpose hidden beneath his impulsive acts and the honour in him was recorded for generations to read. He had loved her, that she was quite certain about, but he'd loved Cersei too. She was his blood, his lover and his soulmate for years, the only woman he’d been with until recently.

His queen, she was, and to protect and safeguard her, his duty and his responsibility. He had gone out attempting what he’d _ want _to be remembered for, and that was what it would be. 

Just as she was about to begin penning the words that would seal his memories forever, a knock diverted her.

“Enter,” she called, carefully placing the quill in the ink bottle.

“Ser Brienne,” greeted Pod, then approached her, beaming.

“Yes, Ser Podrick,” Brienne prompted, wondering what the lad could sought her out for at this late hour. “Your untimely visit had better be important, or--”

“It is,” Pod gushed, grinning from ear to ear, “there’s something you ought to see, m’lady--er--” he stuttered “--someone you might want to meet, I mean.”

“It can wait till tomorrow,” she said, rubbing her tired eyes, not in the right frame of mind for visitors. “Have them shown to the guest chambers and--”

“Ser, _ please _,” Pod was literally begging, his eyes imploring her to consider his request, “meet him. I assure you, you won’t regret it.”

Brienne perused the unfinished page with eyes full of longing, then reluctantly looked up at the young knight. “Very well,” she conceded with a sigh, hoping the interruption to be worth the disruption it had caused her. 

With a quick nod and the smile still pasted on his face, Pod left the room, leaving her, once again, alone with her thoughts and words describing the man she had loved and lost.

_ Faced the army of the dead, _she went back to the line, memorizing every word she’d written, each one pulling her though the time that had gone. She ran a finger along Oathkeeper’s pommel, and moments that would never return played through her head, pounding her with the painful realization that these pages and the gifts he’d showered on her were all that remained of the man who had captured her heart.

The sound of footsteps at the entrance told her that the door was ajar, and in came two visitors, one, of course, Podrick, and the other, a hooded figure in black.

Brienne leapt to her feet as soon as the pair approached her desk, drawn to the stranger, something about him telling her that she would remember this meeting forever, that she wouldn’t regret it. Inching closer, she took in his height, the structure of his body and--she held her breath for a moment--the scent of him which was achingly familiar, reminding her of--

_ No, it can’t be, _she pulled herself back together, and straightened. “How can I help you?” she asked him, her tone crisp and formal, thankfully bearing no evidence of her inner turmoil.

“By forgiving me,” rasped the voice she’d long lost the habit of hearing, and she froze, transported to a time that belonged to an age before the downfall began, the blissful couple of weeks when they were together. _ This is my mind playing tricks, _was the most logical conclusion her brain could put together, but a glance at Pod’s happy face told her that this was beyond her emotional imagination, something she had to wait and watch to see it unfold.

“Good night, Ser Brienne,” Pod excused himself, giving her a slight nod of reassurance, then left her in the company of her _ guest _, gently closing the door as he walked away.

All Brienne could do was stare blankly for a while, unable to say anything, unable to think, hoping against hope that this wasn’t a cruel trick she was an unsuspecting target of. The hood came off, addressing all her doubts, uncovering the face which was a permanent occupant of her mind, the eyes she’d thought had shut forever, the lips she’d ached to kiss just one more time before he’d ridden away to his doom. 

“Brienne,” he said her name with the usual fondness that accompanied the word every time he uttered it, but she stood still, in no state to react, finding it difficult to believe that this was really happening.

“I thought you--you were dead,” were the first words she managed when she'd emerged from the trance.

“I’m here,” he whispered, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a smile that melted her.

“The body in the rubble--”

“--was a rumour Tyrion deliberately spread,” he explained, “so he could smuggle me to safety.”

“Jaime,” she gasped, the tears that she’d suppressed for long, freed at last when she cradled his face, “I don’t--I can’t--” she stopped, her vision blurred and her voice so choked that words simply couldn’t find their way out of her throat.

“Yes, wench, it’s me,” he affectionately confirmed, placing a palm over hers.

“You’re an idiot,” she scolded, allowing him to wipe away her tears.

“I know,” he agreed, his thumb tracing a path across her cheek.

“You’re stupid,” she went on, unstoppable now, “you didn’t care about what I thought, about how much your departure hurt me. Did you even know how broken I was when the news of your death--”

“I know,” he quietly concurred again, then enveloped her in an embrace. “I thought I could save her,” he lamented, a tinge of regret in his voice, “that she could still be redeemed, but I was wrong, and in my desperate attempt to protect her, I did you wrong. I don’t deserve you, Brienne--”

“Shut up,” she stopped him, throwing her arms around his neck, “just--just shut your mouth for once, Jaime, and let me live this moment.”

For many long seconds they held each other, basking in the comfort of their familiarity, savouring the bliss of their togetherness, letting it sink into every bit of them that they’d found one another after days of painful parting, that nothing would ever get between them again.

“I’m sorry, Brienne,” he whispered into her hair, “I--”

“Shh,” she cut him, tightening her grip around him, “there’s no need for all that anymore.”

Many endless moments later, they let go of each other, leaving Brienne wishing that they could stay like this forever, that this night would never end.

“So you’re the Lord Commander now,” he remarked with a touch of admiration in his voice. “Remember the last time I showed you this?” he asked, peering over her shoulder into the white book that still lay open at where she’d left it.

She nodded, smiling, the day he’d given her his sword and so much more, coming back to her as if it were yesterday.

“And you decided to fill my pages,” he observed, reading through all that she’d written. “Brienne, I--” he tried to go on, but his voice broke, and he faltered, running a gentle fingertip along the paragraphs that elaborated his deeds.

“I had thought upon a finishing sentence,” she recalled, glad that she wouldn’t have to pen the words she'd intended to conclude his story with, “but now that it doesn’t fit anymore, I have to change it. I still need to think what to write, how best to--”

“Married Lady Brienne, the future Evenstar,” he softly dictated, gazing into her eyes as he took her hand, “and settled to a life in the Sapphire Isles with his lovely wife and many sons and daughters.”

“Jaime--” she began, replaying his words in her head for them to sink in.

“A fitting conclusion, isn't it?” he prompted, then added, "If you’ll still have me.”

Before she could answer, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply. His lips told her all - his love for her, his desire, his aching need for her and the desperation of their separation, their fiery reunion with hers providing an apt ending to their story that began on a rocky note many years ago in a filthy prison.

“On one condition,” she whispered, holding on to him tightly, unwilling to let go. “Two children are all I can manage, not the horde you’ve been dreaming of.”

“As you wish, ser,” he said, then kissed her once more, showing her what happiness felt like again.


End file.
